If it hasn't been obvious to everyone, I've been struggling with my writing lately. Okay, the honest truth is I haven't been writing at all. I've allowed too many excuses and the imagined lack of time to keep me from doing what I know I really want to do - be a writer.
It's sad sometimes how easily we deceive ourselves. How easily we can create an imagined reality to cover up the truths that should be so evident. Why haven't I been writing? This has been a question that has been bugging me for some time, though I really didn't admit the truth to myself until today.
We bought a treadmill the other day and I was really excited to get back into shape. I know so many of you would be screaming bloody murder at me if you saw the relatively decent shape I'm in, but I got tired of my waistline expanding and my wife wanting me to buy jeans in the next size up. Yes, I only weigh 180, but I don't really want to start buying jeans that are larger than size 36. Hell, I want to get back to my size 34 or even 32.
So once I had the treadmill set up, I jumped on it yesterday and exercised my butt off for a while. I'm looking forward to the next opportunity (Wed or Thurs) when I can get on it again. What does all this have to do with writing? Well, in my case, both activities are very similar.
You see, I used every excuse under the sun to keep from exercising. The gym was too far away. I didn't want to drive for 10 minutes to get there. Too much homework. Yada yada yada. All excuses, no real concrete reasons why I couldn't have just started walking around the block or doing pushups.
As for my writing, I have been using similar excuses (not enough time, no good ideas, etc) as a way to not write. Today I realized how intentionally blind I've been about my own problem. The real truth is that I've had the wind knocked out of my sails and I just didn't want to face the problems head on. My dwindling time spent writing began right after I submitted my short story for critique in the writing class. At that time, I used the excuse of setting it aside as a way to not deal with the revisions. I told myself that this is how you do things. You let it sit for a while, then you get back to it. When the time came to launch back in though, I balked. First I justified things by saying it wasn't long enough yet. Then I just tried ignoring that the story was there, waiting to be finished. Finally, I used all the excuses in the world to keep myself from dealing with "fixing" my story.
Enough is enough though. Just like my excitement for getting back on the treadmill, I will pull out my short story and get to work. While I am still sure it's a pile of crap, I know that's just self doubt talking. The writing can be improved, the doubt can be conquered. But lying to myself about why I'm not writing isn't going to cut it.
How many of you out there are allowing yourself to not write because of doubt? If you've overcome it, what did do to get over the hump?
A to Z Challenge 2013
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Wednesday Wrant - Custer Is A Sex Fiend? Really?
Normally I try not to be too...grumpy...with regards to books. Every author has their own style, and when I don't really like a particular style, I at least try to find something good, something to appreciate.
Currently I'm reading a book called Black Hills by Dan Simmons. I've never read any of his books before, nor do I know really much about the author. The premise however, sounded very interesting so I picked it up. If you haven't read this book and/or are going to, you may wish to avoid the rest of this post since I will probably spoil parts of it for you.
This story (at least so far) is about an American Indian (or is it more PC to say Native American?) who was at Custer's Last Stand as a young brave. He comes upon Custer's dead body and (after touching it) feels invaded by Custer's ghost.
From here, the story bounces back and forth from the character's young life to much later moments in his life as well as different points in between. For the most part, the inclusion of Lakota (Sioux) culture, language, and background is well written. While I can't vouch for the accuracy of the transliteration of the language, I assume it's correct - and there's plenty of it throughout the book.
What do I have to rant about then? Well, for some reason the author portrays Custer (and his wife) as extreme sexual deviants, for one. The story will break from time to time and become a letter from Custer to his wife, in which he talks about various things. By today's standards (depending on who you are of course), their sexual proclivities might not be deviant at all. But for a celebrated general just after the Civil War, the open discussion of oral sex (while his regiment marches by, no less) seems a bit of a stretch. In fact, the author goes to great lengths to describe how often and varied Custer's sexual romps are with his spouse.
One thing I've said many times is no matter who you are or what genre you write in, you have to keep the writing real. You have to keep it honest. I'm also not naive enough to think that sexual discovery wasn't invented until the 1960's. But I find it highly doubtful that such things were discussed openly during the "Wild West" among individuals who were at the higher end of the social scale.
The author has just about lost me as a reader, thanks to these sexual diversions that add nothing to the main story. I've found myself skimming (or even skipping) whole sections where Custer's letters appear just because I have no interest in participating in such idiotic notions. The worst part is that there is so many interesting things about Custer the author could have included rather than making up crap like this. It's too bad really, because it's obvious that alot of effort was put into immersing the reader in the culture of the time from an American Indian's perspective.
I pose the question to you, my faithful followers. I've kept from getting too descriptive about what's going on (mostly because it's rude and I don't wish to offend anyone), but what do you think about books that do this kind of thing? If anyone knows more about Custer's personal life, am I wrong here? Were people more open during this period of time than I am giving them credit for? The comment box is now open.
Currently I'm reading a book called Black Hills by Dan Simmons. I've never read any of his books before, nor do I know really much about the author. The premise however, sounded very interesting so I picked it up. If you haven't read this book and/or are going to, you may wish to avoid the rest of this post since I will probably spoil parts of it for you.
This story (at least so far) is about an American Indian (or is it more PC to say Native American?) who was at Custer's Last Stand as a young brave. He comes upon Custer's dead body and (after touching it) feels invaded by Custer's ghost.
From here, the story bounces back and forth from the character's young life to much later moments in his life as well as different points in between. For the most part, the inclusion of Lakota (Sioux) culture, language, and background is well written. While I can't vouch for the accuracy of the transliteration of the language, I assume it's correct - and there's plenty of it throughout the book.
What do I have to rant about then? Well, for some reason the author portrays Custer (and his wife) as extreme sexual deviants, for one. The story will break from time to time and become a letter from Custer to his wife, in which he talks about various things. By today's standards (depending on who you are of course), their sexual proclivities might not be deviant at all. But for a celebrated general just after the Civil War, the open discussion of oral sex (while his regiment marches by, no less) seems a bit of a stretch. In fact, the author goes to great lengths to describe how often and varied Custer's sexual romps are with his spouse.
One thing I've said many times is no matter who you are or what genre you write in, you have to keep the writing real. You have to keep it honest. I'm also not naive enough to think that sexual discovery wasn't invented until the 1960's. But I find it highly doubtful that such things were discussed openly during the "Wild West" among individuals who were at the higher end of the social scale.
The author has just about lost me as a reader, thanks to these sexual diversions that add nothing to the main story. I've found myself skimming (or even skipping) whole sections where Custer's letters appear just because I have no interest in participating in such idiotic notions. The worst part is that there is so many interesting things about Custer the author could have included rather than making up crap like this. It's too bad really, because it's obvious that alot of effort was put into immersing the reader in the culture of the time from an American Indian's perspective.
I pose the question to you, my faithful followers. I've kept from getting too descriptive about what's going on (mostly because it's rude and I don't wish to offend anyone), but what do you think about books that do this kind of thing? If anyone knows more about Custer's personal life, am I wrong here? Were people more open during this period of time than I am giving them credit for? The comment box is now open.
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
Ten Word Tuesday - Solace Through Writing
Friday, June 18, 2010
Blog Chain - You're My Inspiration
Got it?
Okay, I know you're dying to peel open the cover and get to reading it, but please continue reading this post first. Or come back after you've made it all the way through the book (because you won't be able to put it down).
Now then, on to the question:
From where do you get your inspiration for stories? Give me the oddest, coolest, things that have inspired you.
For me, inspiration comes from all sorts of sources. I get inspired by the usual things, like music or movies. But sometimes my inspiration comes from odd moments or even out of nothing. The movie Stranger Than Fiction was what inspired me to begin writing again, after not being a writer since high school. I was just sitting there hearing the author narrate the story and it resonated with me. I thought, "I could do that. I could write stories like that."
My first attempt at a story involved a homeless woman. The inspiration for it came from all the homeless people I saw on street corners and my thoughts about how much I'd like to help just one of them - assuming they were the type to want to be helped, of course. Although I have yet to do the story justice, it's still there waiting for my writing ability to be up to the task.
Sometimes my ideas just come from thin air. I have another WiP that popped into my head while I was driving with my wife and kids. It involves a future where all genetics are streamlined and predetermined so that pharmaceutical companies can give humanity the medications they think everyone should have. They control society through genetic manipulation, but one of their own geneticists alters his son's genes before he's born. The result is Trevor, the first genetically normal human being born since the cataclysm that brought humanity to their current state of existence. The resulting story sprung from nothing, but it's been fun to explore.
The oddest inspiration I ever had though was while driving to work early one morning. There's a bowling alley near our home and their parking lot was empty except for one lone car. The street lights were casting pools of amber, and my mind began to build the story of someone sitting in that car. The car wouldn't start and everything around them was shrouded in darkness, except for these pools of light. Suddenly there was a strange fog spreading across the parking lot and an electricity in the air that the character could feel in their bones. They knew they had to get out of there. The story has morphed into something very different from where it began, involving otherworldly dimensions, god-like powers, and an indifferent hero. It's still percolating in the back of my mind and I honestly am not sure where it's going to end. But this was by far the oddest source of inspiration I've had.
My predecessor Sandra had a great answer to this question, and Michelle Hickman is all set to follow me tomorrow. Check 'em out; both are great sources of inspiration themselves.
Monday, June 14, 2010
Helllooo.....
Yep, I've been absent for a while. I'm sure nobody noticed. For those that did, I apologize. I took a vacation, from everything. I was off from my day job for a week, and I spent a bunch of time with my kids and wife. We didn't really do anything, just spent time. It was really nice and relaxing. I realize I left everyone and everything here in a lurch, and for that I apologize. I should have at least left notice.
In any event, I'm back and will be getting back to regular posts. I'm currently beginning my Masters degree program, which I am sure will prove to be fairly difficult. I've also applied for a new job, so we'll see how that goes. If I'm lucky, I'll get the opportunity to join a new team and start new adventures in a slightly different direction. I'm keeping my fingers crossed and my hopes up anyway.
I have to admit though, it's fairly energizing to take a vacation like that. No appointments, no demands on my time. Just waking up when I wake up, walking around in the pj's, breathing in and out. If you get the opportunity to do something similar, I highly recommend it. It's amazing how much we miss while we're working away like busy little bees, frantic in our lives to get things done. There's nothing wrong with being productive of course, but taking breaks and relaxing is important too. For example, one evening the wife and I found shapes in the clouds with our kids, marveling at their imaginations and the beautiful shades of color streaking across the sky. Small moments like these can have great impact.
Okay, enough reminiscing about my past vacation. Time to get back to work. Thanks for stopping by.
In any event, I'm back and will be getting back to regular posts. I'm currently beginning my Masters degree program, which I am sure will prove to be fairly difficult. I've also applied for a new job, so we'll see how that goes. If I'm lucky, I'll get the opportunity to join a new team and start new adventures in a slightly different direction. I'm keeping my fingers crossed and my hopes up anyway.
I have to admit though, it's fairly energizing to take a vacation like that. No appointments, no demands on my time. Just waking up when I wake up, walking around in the pj's, breathing in and out. If you get the opportunity to do something similar, I highly recommend it. It's amazing how much we miss while we're working away like busy little bees, frantic in our lives to get things done. There's nothing wrong with being productive of course, but taking breaks and relaxing is important too. For example, one evening the wife and I found shapes in the clouds with our kids, marveling at their imaginations and the beautiful shades of color streaking across the sky. Small moments like these can have great impact.
Okay, enough reminiscing about my past vacation. Time to get back to work. Thanks for stopping by.
Saturday, June 5, 2010
Promised Post - Answers To The Lies
If you haven't read yesterday's post, you should probably go there first. Otherwise, this is a spoiler and you'll miss out on all the fun. For those who read through yesterday's post, here is the list of questions and whether they were true or a lie.
1. While I was in Basic Training for the U.S. Army, I received an Article 15 (a form of discipline) for conspiracy to sell photographs from a Polaroid instant camera.
This is actually the truth. My bunkmate suckered me (and two others) into this, and we made a tidy profit for a while. We were taking pictures of our fellow soldiers and selling the pics to them for a buck a piece. Memoral Day came and we were out of film. Rather than wait the one day until the PX (military version of a store) was open, we decided to go to the main PX on base, which we were forbidden to do. Two of us were lookouts while the other two bought the film. You can guess who got caught by his own drill sgt - yep, me and one other person. Luckily for us, he talked to the Captain and convinced him that we were two otherwise decent soldiers who had just made a stupid mistake. Our punishment was fairly minimal, which was good since it could have been really bad.
2. Ten of the most prominent DC and Marvel comic book characters are emblazoned across my chest in the form of tattoos, including Superman, the Hulk, and Wonder Woman.
This is a lie. There is truth in it though; I actually do have a tattoo on my chest of Superman and The Incredible Hulk - they are the favorite comic book characters of my two sons.
3. During my adult life, I've worked in a multitude of occupations. The jobs have included an amateur race car driver, a professional bowler, a prominent musician, and even a costumed mascot.
While it would be great to have experienced all these things, this is a lie. All these professions were very liberally taken from various video games I've played.
4. The first girl I kissed set up a menage a trois for me with her best friend, in her bedroom, while her father sat in the next room watching television.
This one is interesting, and almost true. At the time, I had no idea this was really what this paticular girl wanted but looking back on the memory, I have since realized that she really did want something like this between the three of us. I was 16 and fairly naive. Alas, I missed out. Probably for the best though lol.
5. I am well-trained in nine martial art forms, including Wu Shu, Ninjitsu, Kempo, Aikido, and Jeet Kune Do. I've been a practicing martical artist since I was six.
While I did formally train in Karate starting at the age of 9, I have only minimal knowledge of the rest of these martial art forms.
6. My favorite snack is chocolate donuts and pickles. At the same time. I've been known to make a midnight trip to 7-11 when the craving strikes.
This is actually a craving my wife had while pregnant with our oldest son. I did have to make the midnight trips to go get her this weird combination though. I got to know the convenience store clerk on that shift fairly well lol.
7. I once totalled a 1991 Geo Metro by jumping a 3 foot high median. Once my tires touched the pavement, I found myself facing oncoming traffic during rush hour. I scraped along the driver side of another compact car, played a quick game of chicken with the Maverick behind them, and finally slammed head on into a pickup truck. The front end of my car crumpled like a tin can and broke both my legs.
There is a bit of truth in this story. I actually did have the Geo Metro and it did get totalled. I was not the one who jumped the median though. A lady in a 73 Maverick was the culprit. She was a drunk driver (a 4 time loser), chasing her ex-husband from bar to bar. She jumped the median, slid along the driver side of my Geo (totalling it), played drunken chicken with the person behind me, and slammed into the truck behind that. She was so drunk, she didn't even feel it when both her legs were snapped in two by the dashboard. I'd like to say she got what she deserved when the case went to court, but that would be a fairy tale. She got away with no charges filed and a waived fine. I'm not kidding. My mom and my wife had to drag me out of the courtroom so I wouldn't call the judge a few choice names.
I hope everyone had as much fun guessing with these as I did writing them. This was really fun. Thanks a bunch Michelle and Brian. You brought a big smile to my face and hopefully to a few others.
1. While I was in Basic Training for the U.S. Army, I received an Article 15 (a form of discipline) for conspiracy to sell photographs from a Polaroid instant camera.
This is actually the truth. My bunkmate suckered me (and two others) into this, and we made a tidy profit for a while. We were taking pictures of our fellow soldiers and selling the pics to them for a buck a piece. Memoral Day came and we were out of film. Rather than wait the one day until the PX (military version of a store) was open, we decided to go to the main PX on base, which we were forbidden to do. Two of us were lookouts while the other two bought the film. You can guess who got caught by his own drill sgt - yep, me and one other person. Luckily for us, he talked to the Captain and convinced him that we were two otherwise decent soldiers who had just made a stupid mistake. Our punishment was fairly minimal, which was good since it could have been really bad.
2. Ten of the most prominent DC and Marvel comic book characters are emblazoned across my chest in the form of tattoos, including Superman, the Hulk, and Wonder Woman.
This is a lie. There is truth in it though; I actually do have a tattoo on my chest of Superman and The Incredible Hulk - they are the favorite comic book characters of my two sons.
3. During my adult life, I've worked in a multitude of occupations. The jobs have included an amateur race car driver, a professional bowler, a prominent musician, and even a costumed mascot.
While it would be great to have experienced all these things, this is a lie. All these professions were very liberally taken from various video games I've played.
4. The first girl I kissed set up a menage a trois for me with her best friend, in her bedroom, while her father sat in the next room watching television.
This one is interesting, and almost true. At the time, I had no idea this was really what this paticular girl wanted but looking back on the memory, I have since realized that she really did want something like this between the three of us. I was 16 and fairly naive. Alas, I missed out. Probably for the best though lol.
5. I am well-trained in nine martial art forms, including Wu Shu, Ninjitsu, Kempo, Aikido, and Jeet Kune Do. I've been a practicing martical artist since I was six.
While I did formally train in Karate starting at the age of 9, I have only minimal knowledge of the rest of these martial art forms.
6. My favorite snack is chocolate donuts and pickles. At the same time. I've been known to make a midnight trip to 7-11 when the craving strikes.
This is actually a craving my wife had while pregnant with our oldest son. I did have to make the midnight trips to go get her this weird combination though. I got to know the convenience store clerk on that shift fairly well lol.
7. I once totalled a 1991 Geo Metro by jumping a 3 foot high median. Once my tires touched the pavement, I found myself facing oncoming traffic during rush hour. I scraped along the driver side of another compact car, played a quick game of chicken with the Maverick behind them, and finally slammed head on into a pickup truck. The front end of my car crumpled like a tin can and broke both my legs.
There is a bit of truth in this story. I actually did have the Geo Metro and it did get totalled. I was not the one who jumped the median though. A lady in a 73 Maverick was the culprit. She was a drunk driver (a 4 time loser), chasing her ex-husband from bar to bar. She jumped the median, slid along the driver side of my Geo (totalling it), played drunken chicken with the person behind me, and slammed into the truck behind that. She was so drunk, she didn't even feel it when both her legs were snapped in two by the dashboard. I'd like to say she got what she deserved when the case went to court, but that would be a fairy tale. She got away with no charges filed and a waived fine. I'm not kidding. My mom and my wife had to drag me out of the courtroom so I wouldn't call the judge a few choice names.
I hope everyone had as much fun guessing with these as I did writing them. This was really fun. Thanks a bunch Michelle and Brian. You brought a big smile to my face and hopefully to a few others.
Friday, June 4, 2010
I Cannot Tell A Lie...Or Can I?
I've been meaning to put up this post for some time now. Brian over at The New Author tagged me for this badge a while ago. Then Michelle Hickman tagged me with it recently as well. Since I consider them both to be very talented friends, I figure I better get around to joining the party. I owe them at least that much. The rules for this award are:
- thank the person who gave you the award
- copy the logo and place it on your blog
- link to the person who nominated you
- tell up to six outrageous lies about yourself and at least one outrageous truth, or vice-versa
- nominate seven "creative" writers
- post links to the blogs you nominate
- leave a comment on each blog letting them know they've won the award
Thanks go out to both Michelle and Brian. I know I'm a bit late, but I really do appreciate it. I've linked to them both. Now comes the fun part - deciding whether to write some serious whoppers or reveal a great deal about myself. You'll have to judge for yourself which is which.
1. While I was in Basic Training for the U.S. Army, I received an Article 15 (a form of discipline) for conspiracy to sell photographs from a Polaroid instant camera.
2. Ten of the most prominent DC and Marvel comic book characters are emblazoned across my chest in the form of tattoos, including Superman, the Hulk, and Wonder Woman.
3. During my adult life, I've worked in a multitude of occupations. The jobs have included an amateur race car driver, a professional bowler, a prominent musician, and even a costumed mascot.
4. The first girl I kissed set up a menage a trois for me with her best friend, in her bedroom, while her father sat in the next room watching television.
5. I am well-trained in nine martial art forms, including Wu Shu, Ninjitsu, Kempo, Aikido, and Jeet Kune Do. I've been a practicing martical artist since I was six.
6. My favorite snack is chocolate donuts and pickles. At the same time. I've been known to make a midnight trip to 7-11 when the craving strikes.
7. I once totalled a 1991 Geo Metro by jumping a 3 foot high median. Once my tires touched the pavement, I found myself facing oncoming traffic during rush hour. I scraped along the driver side of another compact car, played a quick game of chicken with the Maverick behind them, and finally slammed head on into a pickup truck. The front end of my car crumpled like a tin can and broke both my legs.
There you go, ladies and gents. Now you get to decide which of these are true and which are merely figments of my imagination. Good luck. And thanks once more to Michelle and Brian. This was really fun.
I'm going to take a cue from Michelle though and break the rules. Since this badge has made the rounds, I'm only going to pick three others to hoist this on.
Tim Riley had fun with the last time I picked on him. Guess what Tim, you're it again :)
Clarissa Draper is another new follower of mine, so she gets tagged as well.
Lastly, I'd like to hear from Julie Dao. She has a great blog, so I'm hoping she'll join in this fun too.
I can't wait to see who guesses right on this stuff. Let me hear about it in the comments. Tomorrow I'll put up a special post and let you all know what is what.
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